READ THE HEALTH REFORM BILL!

CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL BILL

Look at what is in the Bill!:

Pg 22 of the HC Bill MANDATES the Govt will audit books of ALL EMPLOYERS that self insure!!

Pg 30 Sec 123 of HC bill - THERE WILL BE A GOVT COMMITTEE that decides what treatments/benefits you get

Pg 29 lines 4-16 in the HC bill - YOUR HEALTHCARE IS RATIONED!!!

Pg 42 of HC Bill - The Health Choices Commissioner will choose your HC Benefits for you. You have no choice!

PG 50 Section 152 in HC bill - HC will be provided to ALL non US citizens, illegal or otherwise

Pg 58HC Bill - Govt will have real-time access 2 individs finances & a National ID Healthcard will be issued!

Pg 59 HC Bill lines 21-24 Govt will have direct access to you banks accountsts for electronic funds transfer

PG 65 Sec 164 is a payoff subsidized plan for retirees and their families in unions & community orgs (ACORN).

Pg 72 Lines 8-14 Govt is creating an HC Exchange to bring private HC plans under Govt control.

PG 84 Sec 203 HC bill - Govt mandates ALL benefit packages for private health care plans in the Exchange

PG 85 Line 7 HC Bill - Specs for of Benefit Levels for Plans = The Govt will ration your Healthcare!

PG 91 Lines 4-7 HC Bill - Govt mandates linguistic appropropriate services. Example - Translationfor illegal aliens

Pg 95 HC Bill Lines 8-18 The Govt will use groups i.e., ACORN & Americorps to sign up individuals for Govt HC plan

PG 85 Line 7 HC Bill - Specs of Benefit Levels for Plans. #AARP members - your Health care WILL be rationed

PG 102 Lines 12-18 HC Bill - Medicaid Eligible Individuals will be automatically enrolled in Medicaid. No choice

pg 124 lines 24-25 HC No company can sue GOVT on price fixing. No “judicial review” against Govt Monopoly

pg 127 Lines 1-16 HC Bill - Doctors/ #AMA - The Govt will tell YOU what you can make.

Pg 145 Line 15-17 An Employer MUST automatiocally enroll employees into pubic option plan. NO CHOICE

Pg 126 Lines 22-25 Employers MUST pay for health care for part time employees AND their families.

Pg 149 Lines 16-24 ANY Employer with payroll of 400k & above who does not provide public option. pays 8% tax on all payroll

pg 150 Lines 9-13 Business payroll between 251k & 400k who doesn’t provide public option pays 2-6% tax on all payroll

Pg 167 Lines 18-23 ANY individual who doesn’t have acceptable health care according to Govt will be taxed 2.5% of inc
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Pg 170 Lines 1-3 HC Bill Any NON-RESIDENT Alien is exempt from individual taxes. (Americans will pay for their health care)

Pg 195 HC Bill -officers & employees of health care Administration (GOVT) will have access to ALL Americans financial/personal records

PG 203 Line 14-15 HC - “The tax imposed under this section shall not be treated as tax” Yes, it says that

Pg 239 Line 14-24 HC Bill Govt will reduce physician services for Medicaid. Seniors, low income, poor affected

Pg 241 Line 6-8 HC Bill - Doctors, doesn’t matter what specialty you have, you’ll all be paid the same

PG 253 Line 10-18 Govt sets value of Dr’s time, professional judgment, etc. Literally value of humans.

PG 265 Sec 1131 Govt mandates & controls productivity for private health care industries

PG 268 Sec 1141 Fed Govt regulates rental & purchase of power driven wheelchairs

PG 272 SEC. 1145. TREATMENT OF CERTAIN CANCER HOSPITALS - Cancer patients - welcome to rationing!

Page 280 Sec 1151 The Govt will penalize hospitals for what Govt deems preventable readmissions.

Pg 298 Lines 9-11 Drs, treat a patient during initial admission that results in a re-admission- Govt will penalize you.

Pg 317 L 13-20 PROHIBITION on ownership/investmen t. Govt tells Drs. what/how much they can own.

Pg 317-318 lines 21-25,1-3 PROHIBITION on expansion- Govt is mandating hospitals cannot expand

pg 321 2-13 Hospitals have opportunity to apply for exception BUT community input required. Can u say ACORN?!!

Pg335 L 16-25 Pg 336-339 - Govt mandates establishment of outcome based measures. Health care the way they want. Rationing

Pg 341 Lines 3-9 Govt has authority to disqualify Medicare Adv. Plans, HMOs, etc. Forcing people into Govt plan

Pg 354 Sec 1177 - Govt will RESTRICT enrollment of special needs people!

Pg 379 Sec 1191 Govt creates more bureaucracy - Telehealth Advisory Committee. Can you say health care by phone?

PG 425 Lines 4-12 Govt mandates Advance Care Planning Consult. Think Senior Citizens end of life

Pg 425 Lines 17-19 Govt will instruct & consult regarding living wills, durable powers of attorney. Mandatory!

PG 425 Lines 22-25, 426 Lines 1-3 Govt provides approved list of end of life resources, guiding you in death

PG 427 Lines 15-24 Govt mandates program for orders for end of life. The Govt has a say in how your life ends

Pg 429 Lines 1-9 An “adv. care planning consult” will be used frequentlpatients health deteriorates

PG 429 Lines 10-12 “adv. care consultation” may include an ORDER for end of life plans. AN ORDER from GOV

Pg 429 Lines 13-25 - The govt will specify which Doctors can write an end of life order.

PG 430 Lines 11-15 The Govt will decide what level of treatment u will have at end of life

Pg 469 - Community Based Home Medical Services=Non profit orgs. Hello, ACORN Medical Svcs here!!?

Page 472 Lines 14-17 PAYMENT TO COMMUNITY-BASED ORG. 1 monthly payment to a community-based org. Like ACORN?

PG 489 Sec 1308 The Govt will cover Marriage & Family therapy. Which means they will insert Govt into your marriage

Pg 494-498 Govt will cover Mental Health Services including defining, creating, rationing those services

Yes a man who was light years ahead of his time penned this opening to one of the MOST influential documents ever written in history.

Sadly, today this means nothing to the elected officials governing our once great country. No it didn’t start sliding downhill when the Novelty Obama-nation uttered the statement, “We live in the greatest country in the world; help me change it, but that non hacker sure as fuck hasn’t HELPED things out a whole lot has he?

Motherfuckers (and father fuckers for you ladies who feel left out when I say it) Are lining up to defend this shitbird with statements like “No one can expect him to deliver on all of his campaign promises”. Then WHY the FUCK was he elected by a majority vote? If it doen’t matter what they say, why aren’t we picking a President’s name out of a fucking Fez? (Yeah a turban would just be a freaking hand towel with a bunch of clumps of paper inside it wouldn’t it?)

I’m getting off track here. HEALTH CARE for ALL should be FOR all not just one for us and one for them. I’f I’m having their shit crammed down my throat then at least tell me that they are getting the same lack of condiments that I am. REGULATIONS and REFORM are what the current System needs and not a Socialist, Eastern Block replacement for it.

While we’re at it, lets think about this. Nancy Pelosi and the fucking DNC is all over this shit about Leveling out the WEALTH of the nation. Lets call this what it REALLY is. They want You and I to be in the poorest 85% of the nation so THEY can be in the RICHEST 15% (if they will allow that many people to be as “privileged” as they are for being good enough to get you fucking moronic, mouth breathing masses to vote them into office.

“From Each According to His Abilities and To Each According to His Needs” is the mantra that these fuckaholics are chanting and the Public is chewing that up like it is a NEW concept. Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov brought forth REFORM via these means in a little place that used to be called Russia with these EXACT words.

The FIRST thing that these radicals who wish to infringe upon OUR Inalienable Rights do is to take away the guns of the people that they wish to enslave.

Amendment 2 - Right to Bear Arms. Ratified 12/15/1791. Note
A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

This was written by men who had to shed blood to have the right to protect themselves from all enemies Foreign AND Domestic.

Hitler immediately took away every gun from the Jews and I hope you fucking idiots do remember what happened to them during his rise to power. NOW the Democrats have sought to take guns out of the hands of the people for many years and they always come back to the same thing. They SAY it is for OUR own good so that “Criminals” cannot get their hands on guns to harm us. WAKE THE FUCK UP. They are the criminals that wish to enslave YOU and make you work so that you get just enough to get by and they get MORE than they can possibly expect their grandchildren to be able to spend. if GUNS are so BAD, why are these people all Guarded by agents who have them?

AGAIN… WAKE THE FUCK UP PEOPLE! Our society is being dumbed down by the lack of a true Education System. Our Wages and Income are being attacked, we are being led like lambs to the slaughter and the apathy and brainwashing that our leaders MUST be right just because they hold that position is sickening.

We are soon going to need a Revolution to get the Government out of our wallets, schools, and privacy of our own bedrooms because the MASSES can no longer think for themselves or ask the simple questions and react to the answers that are given to them rather than just going with the flow.

I can no longer sit idly by and watch the destruction of the greatest nation in the world. Who has the guts to speak out with me?

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_L6pDyjqqsvY/Sl4Y4sr5fGI/AAAAAAAAc04/GcLzEjOYTac/s1600-h/healthcare+map.JPG

I’m striking a blow for closing the gender gap. No, I’m not campaigning for equal pay for equal work, or not having women’s careers suffer because it falls to our gender to push the next generation into the world after it masses at our pelvises for 9 months, or even for research into treatment for post-menopausal libido and getting tight-fisted insurance companies to actually pay for it the way they throw money at erectile dysfunction. Nope. I wish I could be so lofty-minded and reach so far, but I am carrying on my crusade in a different way.

For years I’ve been told that men objectify women simply because men are more visually-oriented. “Men can’t help their inability to look past your breasts, butt, legs, eyes, or lips—it is in their biology. They are just more visually-oriented.” And, I’ve also heard it said that looks aren’t as important to women as they are to men. Men look for women who are arm-candy and women look for men with “personality” and “stability”.

And this is where I make my stand. If guys are going to look at me and evaluate me based on my looks before they ever get to know me, then I say turnabout is fair play. Let’s see just how far personality gets you, jackass.

I’m not suggesting that I’m going to start evaluating every guy I meet based on looks. Not at all. I’m saying I already do that. And if that sounds shallow to you men out there, consider what you look at when you first meet a woman. Is it her character? Is it her sparkling wit? Or is it whether the junk in her trunk offsets the allure of her blouse bunnies?

I tweeze, tone, exfoliate, watch what I eat, aerobicize, groom, choose to wear clothes that fit, close my mouth when I chew my food, and only eat spinach in public with extreme caution. But, culturally-speaking, I’m supposed to get excited about a guy who has made no effort with his health or appearance or manners solely because he’s single and, according to his doting mother, has a great personality? That hardly seems fair. Especially since he’s looking at my breasts trying to figure out exactly what percentage is me and what percentage is gel bra, all while I’m supposed to be admiring his inner beauty.

Yep, men you are on notice. For me, it just isn’t good enough for you to maintain a steady diet of junk-food and pair it with no exercise and rumpled clothes from the bottom of your closet that you’ve owned since college. You aren’t 17 anymore, your mother shouldn’t still be choosing your underwear for you. It isn’t the mid-90s anymore so unless you are a lumberjack there is no reason to wear over-sized, raggedy flannel shirts. Unless you are McSteamy, Santa, Freud, ZZ Top, or Wolverine, forget the facial hair. I don’t care if Justin Timberlake is wearing a beard, on you it isn’t bringing sexy back, its bringing back Neanderthal man. And, unless you are actually on a basketball court, there is no good reason to wear those awful polyester basketball shorts.

Despite the myth of conventional wisdom, women are into looks. We’re not solely into looks, but we are into them. After all, they don’t put fat guys with lots of back hair on the cover of romance novels. Here’s the difference in how we approach and value attractiveness: men look at women as if we are already furnished, designer decorated houses, but women look at men more like fixer-upper homes, the kind that need a lot of work. Guys look at their brides (who starved themselves for a couple months to fit in that stupid dress) as if they’ll always look that way. Brides look at their grooms and think, “Well, it’s a start. But what is going on with his hair?”

Women are not involved with a guy for too long before we start the improvement process. And it is a process. At restaurants we’ll get you to try our salads. In stores we will see something better than anything in your closet and work our flattery to get you to try it on. When people move in together the socks, underwear, and t-shirts with holes in them start to mysteriously disappear—maybe it was a “laundry mishap”, maybe it was leprechauns, who knows. Without you even having to think about it or make an effort you have healthier cereal in the cupboard and dentist and doctor appointments scheduled for you. We remind you to get haircuts. We tell you when you have spinach in your teeth. We tell you not to wear the wrinkled shirt or that really ugly tie. We go to the gym with you. We gently suggest that you abandon the comb-over because it isn’t fooling anyone.

This is why we get so pissed off when you tell us something makes us look fat. Who wants to take fashion advice from the guy who thinks his dumpy, worn out corduroy shorts are still dope?

I have heard my male friends go on and on about the acceptable amount of cellulite on a woman’s body, the proper length of hair and shade of highlights, and adequate skin care regimens. They have opinions on everything from the kinds of heels we should wear to attract them, to the great importance of a well-maintained landing strip. These dear, dear men of my acquaintance think nothing of women devoting all this time and energy to make themselves attractive to men. And yet, I haven’t heard any of these paragons talk about improving themselves so women will be interested in them. So, in the interest of equality and full-disclosure, here are a couple of my must haves for the male species.
•    Trim your nose hair. If it looks like you have a cheap toupee bunched in each nostril, or even if it looks like a couple spider legs creeping out of your nose, it is time to trim. Use scissors, a trimmer, a weed whacker, garden shears, I don’t care. Just trim it. I find that even the guys who seem to care about their appearances are prone to overlooking this one. How am I supposed to carry on a conversation with you when I’m watching something from your nose reach out to tickle your lip?
•    Health—more than a class you slept through in high school. Sedentary lifestyles and poor diets contribute to obesity and it’s myriad health problems. You don’t have to be an Iron Man competitor or a nutritionist, but it is nice to know a guy gets some exercise on a regular basis and has a basic understanding that what he eats affects his health. I don’t want to wonder if he is actively attempting to get type II diabetes, or have to check to make sure he has his heart medication and portable defibrillator when we go out.
•    Fit isn’t just for condoms. How in or out of style your clothes are isn’t as important as whether or not your clothes fit. That said, it helps if your clothing looks like it belongs in the current decade and is age- and activity-appropriate. If you have gained weight, lost weight, had a growth spurt, or just had a bad experience doing laundry, it is probably time to go shopping. Tugging buttons on a shirt or your pants make you look fatter than you are. Things that are too big and sloppy make you look like a hobo. If your belly sticks out from under your shirt…you really need help.
•    Hygiene, it’s not just for women. We’re not talking about manscaping, back-waxing, or eye-brow tweezing, nope we’re talking about regular showers, deodorant use, tooth brushing and flossing. Am I stating the bleeding obvious? Yes. But I say it anyway because I find plenty of guys neglecting it and that just amazes me. If you feel like doing the rest of that stuff, that’s fine, but make sure you take care of the basics. I don’t care how good your eye-brows look if you smell like you’ve been cleaning a pig-sty during a heat-wave in August. And, I don’t care how dandy your conversational skills are if your breath smells like road kill.
•    Manners. Good manners show respect to those around you. When a guy chews with his mouth open, holds his fork like a bike handle, takes calls from other people while we are out together, ignores the living, breathing person in front of him in favor of texting, or is rude to my friends. We don’t have a future.

Well, there it is, my bare minimum. This is not to say that any guy who trims his nose hair, eats well, exercises, dresses with some degree of skill, doesn’t stink, and chews with his mouth closed automatically gets a second look, but it certainly increases his chances.

Yep, that title is correct, back to work. Being a retired electrician with 35 years experience in the construction industry, those three words have special meaning to me. First, a little background. I wrote, and sold, my first magazine article in 1973 to Old West magazine on the Death Valley Borax wagons. It was an interesting subject and I have since sold that same article, with some rewriting, nine times over the years bringing in over $1500. I’ve also written a piece on slot machines, honey bees, San Jose, California’s Winchester Mystery House, electrical subjects, parenting, raising teenagers, my experiences during the Vietnam War (and it was a war, not a conflict), windmills, fishing, hunting (I eat what I catch or kill), lost gold mines and just interesting characters and subjects. I’ve gone from pounding away on a typewriter (those antique machines that actually used a ribbon) to a computer.

Several years ago, I had an episode of PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder, something brought back from Vietnam) that almost killed me, literally. The shrink I went to couldn’t figure out why I’d be having flashbacks after all these years and I went on Prozac, or something similar, and my writing suffered. I couldn’t concentrate long enough to finish anything, after several pages my mind would wander and I’d lose track of what I was doing. I’d sit for hours in front of the screen and not touch a key, just stare. Unfortunately for me, I couldn’t remember what I was thinking about and this didn’t help with the shrink sessions. Again, unfortunately, this carried over to my driving. I’d start out just to drive to the grocery store and end up a hundred miles away and not remember getting there. Now that was scary and I knew something had to be done before I hurt myself.

It wasn’t the shrink who came up with a cure, he was more interested in grabbing his paycheck from the VA than helping veterans, but my inner voice. No, I’m not crazy but that’s open to interpretation. I figured the only one who knew me best was best qualified to diagnose my problems — myself. So what did I do? I went fishing for a week, packed my truck, grabbed a couple boxes of worms and found myself a secluded spot to be by myself. It was high up in the Rocky Mountains, off the beaten path (I have four-wheel drive truck), set up my tent by the water and tossed in a line. I spent a week catching trout, cooking them over an open fire, drinking beer (something I hadn’t done in ages) and began to sort out my life (you don’t need to be a teenager to do that).

I figured out that I was in a rut with my life, I wasn’t doing anything but feeling sorry for myself for getting older but not necessarily wiser. I’d lost my retirement through a faulty investment firm, all $165,000 of it, am now living on a small pension and Social Security and living with my daughter. I had become that which I had always despised, dependent on someone else. Okay, I didn’t have a lot of money, so what could I do about it. I couldn’t return to work, my body has been beat up too much and wouldn’t take it. I’m not one to set up a scam on the Internet and rip people off. That left one avenue open to me, return to my writing. I’m still on anti-depressants and mood-changing chemicals but I’m much better for having that talk with myself, I now know where I’m going and how to get there.

I now devote three hours a day to writing, anything just to get words down on paper, or screen. I’m exploring new subjects, making a list of things I’m fairly knowledgeable about and researching potential markets. It still takes me a while to finish a project but at least I’m finishing it now. I’m also posting blogs in order not only to help myself but others as well, just maybe my experiences will help someone else get through life. Let me tell you, getting old isn’t for sissies. It takes determination and perseverance to get up in the morning and check the obituaries to see if my name in in there. It isn’t? Then it’s going to be a good day and I sit down to write, like this morning. Just maybe, someone will read this and tell themselves that their life isn’t so bad after all.

Wish I could invite my dad over to my house for Father’s Day and celebrate. I sure would like to Bar-B-Q him some steak or salmon. Whatever he might want. Unfortunately, it’s impossible for us to get together.

He was my first hero. I’ll never forget the day he took me and my sister to the beach and someone started drowning. In a flash, my dad ran and dove into the ocean. He quickly pulled this guy out and saved his life. A crowd of people had gathered. Everyone was so glad the guy lived. I wonder if this experience had anything to with me becoming a lifeguard later in life.

During summers, my dad took us kids camping at fantastic places like Yellowstone and Sequoia National Park. I wonder if this had anything to do with me eventually getting a job with the U.S. Forest Service or living next to a national forest today.

As an LAPD officer, Dad patrolled South Central L.A. for 20 years. He had a tough, dangerous job dealing with street gangs but Dad was very macho. He totally bought into that whole Marlboro man image the tobacco companies sell so well. Seemed like he always had a cigarette going. I first started smoking when I was 16. I wonder if my dad’s smoking had anything to do with it.

When my dad got emphysema, I realized smoking had serious, unpleasant consequences. One day, when I was working in my photo studio in Hollywood, I set up a modeling mirror and took a good look at myself with a cigarette dangling from my lips (in that classic James Dean style). With my father’s emphysema situation on my mind, I didn’t look very “cool” to myself anymore. Actually, I thought I looked butt faced stupid - Like my face was really grotesque and there was a cigarette being smoked in my butt crack. How disgusting!

It was time to quit. I found out quitting was easier said than done. In fact, quitting smoking was the hardest thing I’ve ever struggled with. I really liked smoking. I liked having a cup of coffee and a smoke, a beer and a smoke, a smoke after a great meal, a smoke after great sex, driving and smoking. Heck - anything and smoking. But it was just too unhealthy and I especially didn’t like looking stupid to people who didn’t smoke. Many times when I was trying to quit, I would smoke the last cigarette of a pack and tell myself, “I’m not buying another pack.” Then at 2:30 a.m., I would find myself lying in bed desperate for a cigarette. Unable to sleep, I would climb out of bed and rummage through my trash cans until I found a butt to light. What an ordeal. Eventually, I did quit, but it was the hardest damn thing I’ve ever done. Today, I have much sympathy for anyone who is addicted to nicotine and all of the mysterious, toxic chemicals the greedy tobacco companies add to natural tobacco to make cigarettes extra addictive and maximize sales.

I was still working in Hollywood when my friend Debbie was trying to get gigs as a stand-up comedian. I offered to help her brainstorm for her comedy routines and she promised to do some modeling for me. We had fun kicking around some comedy stuff over a few gin and tonics. Then I told her about the humorous photo concepts I wanted her to consider working on as a model. For one idea, I described how I thought people’s faces look like dumb-ass butts when they put a cigarette in their little, face hole. Perhaps this could be a humorous “No Smoking” poster or greeting card. LOL - Debbie said she didn’t want to do any ass modeling, especially because her butt had too much cellulite. I reassured her that her butt would be fine because I wanted my image to be the opposite of the sexy tobacco company ads. When Debbie realized she would be able to recount this unusual modeling experience for a funny stand up bit, she became much more enthusiastic. Debbie even called her best friend who immediately volunteered to come down to my studio and assist with cigarette placement during the photo shoot.

To all you smokers out there, If you can’t quit, I hope you at least cut down and minimize the damage. I know how hard it is because I’ve been there. I’m not trying to put anybody down who chooses to smoke. I’m just saying, for your sake and the sake of your family, I hope you don’t end up like my dead father… weak, sick, hooked up to an oxygen tank suffering a slow, unpleasant, untimely death.

You can see more photos by Mountain Dude at www.dporterdvd.com

Why in the hell do people find it necessary to cause me to have an exploding aneurysm just by their own little quirks. First off how dumb are they to think that these things are acceptable and are they still that dumb to think that well hell nobody minds. So here’s a partial list of people that ought to be set on fire and kicked from a moving semi-truck.

People who whistle in Public. God I can not describe the instant anger I get when I walk into a store or am trying to shop and some jack-off is whistling a merry tune! First off I don’t care if you’re happy I don’t. Keep it to your fucking self. ON that note you’re destroying my mood by giving me a splitting head-ache by having to listen to that high pitched sound for a extended period of time. I swear the next person that whistles when I’m in the store is getting 3/4 inch wrench smacked across their teeth.

Fat people that use the store scooters. I’m sure every one of us has had to get out of the way for the big ball of lard scooting down on a scooter because they’ve gotten so fat they don’t want to take the effort to carry their own baubles ass around any more. Folks you do remember the original intention of the store’s scooters don’t you. They were originally for people that had a busted leg or for the elderly who at their advanced age have a harder time getting around then some. Do those people get to use those things HELL NO! Why because the store only has two of them and the great big slobs outnumber everyone else in society have slurped their jelly belly’s into the chairs and are scooting around the store because God forbid they actually burn off a few calories. Just a side note if you’re looking to lose a few pounds parking further back in the parking lot when you run your errands will rack up a lot of burned calories in conjunction with a diet.

Getting back to the scooters though now the elderly have to walk around with at best mild arthritis in their hips so they get to shop in PAIN. Golly I hope they don’t have something worse with them that makes regular walking almost impossible but no they can’t have the scooter. Apparently getting old is the same as getting fat. The guy with the busted leg or severely screwed up leg well he’ll just have to hobble because couldn’t stop eating Big Mac’s needs the scooter more than him. These balls of lard should be deep fried like the food they keep sucking down.

The final group of low IQ morons that should have their eyes plucked out with a rusty fork are these people that back into a parking space. Folks I’m sure you’ve been driving and you get to the parking lot of your favorite store and you almost get into a wreck because some jackass just HAS to back into a parking space. Usually this person who’s family tree really resembles a wreath more than a tree is usually some redneck asshole driving a gigantic truck thinking he’s the most powerful thing in the world making everyone stop while he backs into the spot. Usually this waste of carbon is wearing a white t-shirt that hasn’t been washed in three days and wearing a baseball cap that says “get er done”

Doesnt this moron know that he’s holding up the whole fucking parking lot. And for what pourpose it’s easier to back out of a parking space. Or is it just because he knows he works a shitty job, has no real life or creativity outside of the best way to hide beer cans around the house that he does this activity for a fleeting glimpse of what it’s like to be important. I have an idea for these people or I’ll say guys. We take them and put them in a dirt arena and release ten pissed off and starving wolverines and if they can make it 5 minutes they win a lifetime supply of beer and steak. Not a big change from they’re normal diet. And they’re given a 30 minute show on  ESPN 6.

Well that’s pretty much what’s pissing me off today

Until next time folks

Warcopse

I hate flies. I especially hate it when they buzz my ears. Flies ruin picnics and the diseases they carry can cause innocent people to become desperately ill.

There’s a scene in Sam Raimi’s new movie, “Drag Me To Hell,” where a beautiful young heroine is sleeping in her bed while a filthy black fly creeps all the way up inside of her nostril. It’s an unsettling scene.

What happened to one of my neighbors is even more unsettling and it was real life. Not some creepy movie. Tiny, odious villains attacked my neighbor by invading her vagina. The relentless onslaught in her most private area continued round the clock until she felt so sick she had to go to a hospital. When doctors told her that she had ovarian cancer, her life became a tortuous nightmare. I can’t think of anything more terrifying (except a doctor telling me I have prostate cancer and they want to cut my balls off).

My neighbor didn’t know what to do. Her doctors recommended chemo therapy which kills good cells as well as cancerous cells. She heard from friends that there are some good, alternative treatments available, but she also heard about scam slime (those despicable, dishonest people who prey on sick people like vultures). My neighbor chose chemo therapy and went through so much pain and nausea, she told me, “If I knew how bad chemo was going to be, I would rather have just died.”

The expensive chemo treatments kept her alive for two more years (if you believe mostly lying in bed with pain, feeling weak and sick is “being alive”). Then, sadly, she passed away.

If you never listened to anyone describe the horror of their cancer sufferings, just watch the documentary by Farah Fawcett and you will understand. You will also want to avoid the anguish of going through anything like that, if at all possible.

It’s too bad people get cancer in the first place. If they knew more about what causes cancer and what helps prevent cancer, they might be able to avoid such tragedies.

Apparently, it helps to stay away from eating refined sugar, simple carbohydrates and hydrogenated oil. The stuff cancer thrives on. If you must eat foods such as donuts, eat them in moderation. I would never travel all the way to New Orleans without enjoying deep fried beignets at Cafe Du Monde. However, I wouldn’t eat beignets everyday unless I wanted to feed a death wish.

Besides avoiding dangerous, deep fried sugar monsters, you can fortify yourself with super-foods which will heroically go to war against carcinogens which may attack your breasts, uterus, colon or prostate. Some of the greatest superheroes are garlic, carrots, cabbage and walnuts.

I don’t want terrorist cells lurking around inside of my country and I don’t want cancer cells lurking around inside of my body. After the 911 attacks, we spent millions of dollars fortifying our borders and airports from radical extremists who are hellbent on killing Americans. There is no guarantee that these efforts will keep all agents of terror outside of this country, but I like increasing the odds for survival. For similar reasons, I decided to fortify my body with super-foods to increase the odds of keeping cancer causing agents outside of my body.

The only problem is - Carrots and cabbage aren’t as yummy as donuts.

Since I enjoy eating great tasting food as well as traveling, I decided to explore the world looking for a delicious super-food recipe (something I could look forward to eating instead of just choking down like cod liver oil). First, I went to Europe hoping to find the perfect French or Italian recipe. I ran across some great recipes but nothing featuring super-foods. Thanks to the internet, my travels only took a few hours so I pressed on to India. Then I searched Asia. I continued exploring all the way around the world to Costa Rica, and down to South America, where finally, I made a great discovery. (Eat your heart out, Columbus.)

I discovered “Chilean Carrot Salad,” a common side-dish popular around Santiago, Chile. This nutritious and affordable, cancer fighting super-salad consists of grated carrots, chopped garlic, cilantro, lemon juice and canola oil.

In the spirit of Emeril Lagasse, I kicked this simple carrot salad up a notch by adding raisins, walnuts, cabbage and ginger. BAM - I ended up with a delicious salad that I regularly enjoy eating which also protects me from getting cancer. As a bonus, eating this salad for lunch instead of eating dangerous diner foods like French fries and Monte Cristo sandwiches has made it easy to lose more than a few pounds and save money.

MOUNTAIN DUDE’S KICKED UP CANCER FIGHTING CARROT SALAD:

2 cups grated carrots (about 4 medium sized carrots), 1/2 cup shredded cabbage (red cabbage is best), 3 tabl. walnut pieces, 3 tabl. raisins, 2 tabl. cilantro (finely chopped), 2 tsp. garlic (finely chopped), 2 tsp. fresh ginger (finely chopped), 2 tabl. fresh squeezed lemon juice, 1 tabl. canola oil or olive oil. Mix ingredients together in a large bowl. Makes 4 servings.

You can see more photos by Mountain Dude at www.dporterdvd.com

The power of prayer to cure illness has been in the news lately and is the second part in my rant on alternative treatments. Now I don’t care if you believe in a God or not, I’m not writing this to question anyone’s belief. I’m just questioning when people don’t get the treatment they need because they think a higher power will make them well.

To start if you’re sick and you want to pray that you’ll get better go right ahead. Or if you have a friend who’s sick and you want to pray for their recovery go ahead. However if you start getting sicker or your illness won’t go away in ten days take yourself to the doctor. If you have something like arthritis or diabetes feel free to pray all you want. Just consult a medical professional in conjunction with your prayer regiment.

I’ll give an example of this a Wisconsin woman is now convicted of second degree reckless homicide involving her daughter. Her daughter had diabietes an easily controled condition trough insulin. However this woman belived that the body got sick as a result of sin. So instead of taking her daughter to the doctor she formed a prayer circle and the prayed around the little girl. Anyway she had to pass out before anyone called 911 by then it was to late to do anything.

People it’s great if you want to trust your eternal soul to God. But while your here with your mortal life can you at least listen to a doctor.

Now lets be clear I’m not ragging on alternative treatments, IF THEY WORK! If you have strep throat and willow bark clears it up great however if you are still sick after three days it might be time to look at a more traditional treatment because the herbs or viatamins aren’t working. Also if you do elect alternative treatments make sure you see a professional and not make your decisions by reading a book you got at Borders.

My job is brainless. I sit and do hand-eye coordination maneuvers with small precision tools until a tooth forms. Which is great because it allows my true genius to flourish (inside my head, for eight whole hours a day).

I was listening to the radio the other day (at work) and they mentioned that the cost of liposuction was like, I don’t know – I actually, technically didn’t hear, but I heard my boss yell out “$2,500 to $3,000 for liposuction!”. And that was all it took. My Einstein busted through the mire of my boredom and went hog-wild. Wild, abandoned, unrestrained inspiration raged from every brain cell in my head for a good five to ten minutes. Fat is big business.

Upon further research (just now), I discovered that a single-area procedure could be anywhere from $2,000 to $8,000 for a single day, and lipo-suctioning more areas over a longer period of time could run as high as $20,000!!!

Now if we could just figure out a way (I KNOW it has to be possible) to transform that product into something that could feed our cars, we could kill two birds with one stone.

Judging by the average “size” of this nation, we could wipe out the entire energy crises, cure our dependency on foreign oil (that fat has GOT to burn down to good old-fashioned oil – bacon does), boost the economy, wipe out obesity, get in shape, improve the world’s opinion of us, and make money in the process. Godd*mn –that’s even more than two birds. That’s a flock of wild geese.

Think of it. Gas guzzling would take on a whole new meaning. There could be lipo/gas stations where you could either trade your fat for miles, or simply sell large portions of yourself and – screw cars – buy a plane ticket to anywhere! (a tropical island – and now you could even wear that itty bitty swimsuit you’ve been dreaming about. And you’d have plenty of spending booty in your pocketbook to spend ..on souvenirs…drinks…and of course! Local Cuisine!!!!).

Which brings up the point… given the possibilities, people – everyone – would probably buy and consume WAY MORE FOOD! Here in Minnesota we all put on at least a good twenty pounds over the winter. A few more tater tot hot dishes a week, couple more pounds of meat and potatoes, double the gravy, hell YES to bacon, and we’d be rolling in the dough by the time spring trickled in. By adding only a few more items to our winter diets a day, we’d have some serious pounds to leverage that spring vacation on. And we wouldn’t even have to sweat the frantic getting-in-shape-before-we-try-to-get-in-that-d*mn-swimsuit trauma. We just roll by the Lipostation on our way to the airport, swimsuits in hand. Yippy-ki-yay Mehico - here I come!! (well.. maybe not Mehico)

Anyways…BTW – no offense to anyone struggling with their weight…Honestly, if there was a way to do it, I’d be the first in line to trade my ass in for a road trip. It might not get me to the In-n-Out burger I’ve been dreaming of (for three years now, going on four) but it could get me a day or two off.

D*mn this has been a long winter. And I’ve had WAY too much time to think.