Many complaints have been made against the educational system, HOWEVER what most people seem to overlook is why it was created in the first place.

During high school, I discovered a startling fact: “Napoleon created the premise of public education for the purpose of conditioning society to be a subservient culture. To follow orders and not question them.”

In the Land of the Free, and Home of the Brave, does this system foster a generation of free thinkers? No, it creates two separate classes of youth:

1. Those who ingest and regurgitate information.

2. Those who rebel against the system.

Very rare is it to see an individual who thinks for them self and can create new and exciting ways to navigate through society.

Just a thought.

I’m disgusted. What’s more depressing than the economy? What’s more of a bummer than all the people losing their jobs, their homes, their hope, their fucking everything?

I’ll tell you what. Walking down to Stillwater’s infamous FORMERLY FREE Lumberjack Days celebration and seeing it barred shut. Getting a load of the massive quantities of youngsters, huddled in huge groups, loitering, bored, and bummed on every curb just OUTSIDE the chainlink fences and gates barring them from the formerly FREE TO ALL Lumberjack Days celebration. I can’t think of too many teenagers that are going to fork over $10 so that they can then fork over another $5-$6 on the hotdog they were planning on scoring while watching a few interesting acts onstage and looking for familiar faces in the fun, festive, normally packed, sometimes weird, always entertaining crowd.

Teenagers weren’t the only people turning away from the ridiculously prison-like barrage of chain-linkfencing. In case you hadn’t picked up on it, for the first time, they’re charging a $10 cover to get inside what was before, a down-home, local, fun, free, old-fashioned small town annual celebration.

Yeah so it got out of hand when Lynard Skynard played a few years back. Whatever. Bad planning.

Hell, I won’t even pay $10 to get into the State Fair and that’s pretty big-time.

All I have to say is (edit this): City of Stillwater, you just fucked all your Lumberjack Days Vendors in the ASS. Way to stick it to the little guy trying to make a buck.

Major fucking Bummer. Guess I’ll go take my usual hike in a state park - the fee for that is only $25 a YEAR (not counting the $105 fine I had to pay for forgetting to update my annual pass in time.)

What a fucking money grubbing pathetic world we live in. I’m disgusted and ashamed Stillwater. Fucking disgusted. Take your infamous celebration and shove it up your money-grubbing touristy ass.

So there I am at the convenience store the other day. It’s early evening, so the place is crowded. People hitting the ATM, getting some sandwiches, etc. So the front parking lot is packed. In fact, it’s full, there are no free spots. In such instances, most rational people would merely drive the extra 60 feet to the parking lot on the side. That’s what we did because I am of said rational mind. My wife went in to use the ATM, and I was waiting in the car. It was here I saw something that really fucking pisses me off.

Car comes in from the street. It pauses as there are no open spots in the front parking lot. Well, not exactly, there is one open spot-the handicap spot. Surely this car won’t park …son of a bitch! The black Pontiac cruises right into the spot. I can see there are no handicap plates, nor is there a tag hanging from the rear view mirror. What happens next makes me sick. The driver’s side door opens as a woman gets out. Right after that, from the back seat, emerge 2 kids.

What kind of fucking example is she setting for those 2 kids? “Hey, kids, if you see a cheap way to get by, take it! That’s what I do!” From her demeanor getting out of the car, she was clearly not ashamed to be parking in the handicap spot. She disappears into the store. It’s merely conjecture on my part, but I think she’s going in there to buy smokes for her kids, but I could be wrong.

I think assholes who do this shit be immediately handicapped themselves. In fact, I just petitioned by township to install me to the newly created title of town handicapper. They informed me they already have an official handicapper, his name is Sal and he hangs out at the Town Tavern most nights. I told them, no, I wanted to be a different kind of handicapper. I would station myself at random public parking lots; malls, shopping centers, grocery stores, churches, etc. And whenever I see someone without the proper tags park in a handicap spot, I just wait for them. With a baseball bat. As they walk out, I would politely step on their foot and swing for the fences at their knee. You’re handicapped now, sucker. Lesson learned.

For some reason, the township didn’t go for it, but my point still stands. I absolutely hate seeing people trying to get an unfair advantage. Is it really all that important to park 10 feet closer to the door just to pick up a paper and some joe? How low class to take it just out of sheer laziness. I can’t imagine if someone who really needs the spot can’t get into it. What kind of example is she setting for her kids? She is probably the same kind of person who walks her dog, but never picks up the poop. The same kind of person that doesn’t put things back right in the gym. The same kind of person that has 25 items in the express lane. The same kind of person that makes my blood absolutely boil.

The world is too full of these people.

You know I swear to God I don’t know what in the hell is wrong with a majority of people these days. I’ll give you two examples.

I’m not sure if anyone outside MN knows but there’s a 13 year old boy that has Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. With treatment he has a 95% chance of survival. So after being diagnosed and getting a treatment plan set up he goes for his first round of treatment. Like most people how have Chemo he got sick. After seeing their son in such a state the parents and the kid decided on no more Chemo instead opting for a natural holistic approach. Just so you know without Chemo the kid’s survival chances drop to around 5%.

So the kids docs try to force him into to treatment with a court order. He and his family respond by saying that it’s against his religious belief system to have Chemo. I believe he said “I want to meet my creator with a clean body and having Chemo would make me unclean” And the natural methods involved little more than willow bark and ginger tea from what I gathered in the paper. So after a court fight the judge ordered the kid into treatment. He ordered a X Ray be taken to see if the natural remedies had any effect and a new Chemo plan be drawn up. He also stipulated that the Chemo would be in conjunction with a natural regiment as well. He ended the hearing by saying to the boy “You may not think you’re that sick and you don’t look sick but trust me you are very very sick”

The doctors were comprised of six oncologist 3 pediatricians and even acupuncturists and herbalists that all said the same thing “The kid needs treatment natural remedies are not going to do it”.  The Parents and the kid had almost nothing concrete to offer except for religious beliefs. Oh and a public outcry of support which left my mouth hanging open. Thousands of people with signs that said “Say no to Drugs” and “Natural remedies work” touting personnel freedoms and patient rights and parental rights in deciding what’s best for their kids. Did any of these people bother to look at the medical evidence.

Now if the kid was an adult I’d have no problem with him refusing treatment. It’d be his personnel right to refuse Chemo against all logic. But he’s not an adult and his parents are basing their decision on fear and a desire not to see their son suffering. Well sometimes you have to go through hell to get better. Well anyway the X Ray was taken and guess what the cancer’s grown back to it’s original size and is still expanding. What amazes me is even with all this there are still people that are pissed about the judge decision to save the kids life.

They constantly write into the paper or call in on talk shows. Saying that the judge is evil and wrong and should not have interfered with “A very private decision” Or they still say that nature has all the cures he needs. Well nature had it’s shot and it failed it’s time for man made western medicine to take over. There is nothing wrong with taking herbs or vitamins for simple things. Like if you have stomach problems feel free to take a herbal tea. If you have a cold take some vitamin C, If you can’t sleep chew on some Valerian root or have a beer. But if you have something like lets say Bronchitis take the penicillin.

Anyway I’ll write the other example later

Warcorpse

PS if you do take herbs make sure you talk to a herbalist before you. Some of the deadliest poisons on earth are a combination of herbs and plants.

My job is brainless. I sit and do hand-eye coordination maneuvers with small precision tools until a tooth forms. Which is great because it allows my true genius to flourish (inside my head, for eight whole hours a day).

I was listening to the radio the other day (at work) and they mentioned that the cost of liposuction was like, I don’t know – I actually, technically didn’t hear, but I heard my boss yell out “$2,500 to $3,000 for liposuction!”. And that was all it took. My Einstein busted through the mire of my boredom and went hog-wild. Wild, abandoned, unrestrained inspiration raged from every brain cell in my head for a good five to ten minutes. Fat is big business.

Upon further research (just now), I discovered that a single-area procedure could be anywhere from $2,000 to $8,000 for a single day, and lipo-suctioning more areas over a longer period of time could run as high as $20,000!!!

Now if we could just figure out a way (I KNOW it has to be possible) to transform that product into something that could feed our cars, we could kill two birds with one stone.

Judging by the average “size” of this nation, we could wipe out the entire energy crises, cure our dependency on foreign oil (that fat has GOT to burn down to good old-fashioned oil – bacon does), boost the economy, wipe out obesity, get in shape, improve the world’s opinion of us, and make money in the process. Godd*mn –that’s even more than two birds. That’s a flock of wild geese.

Think of it. Gas guzzling would take on a whole new meaning. There could be lipo/gas stations where you could either trade your fat for miles, or simply sell large portions of yourself and – screw cars – buy a plane ticket to anywhere! (a tropical island – and now you could even wear that itty bitty swimsuit you’ve been dreaming about. And you’d have plenty of spending booty in your pocketbook to spend ..on souvenirs…drinks…and of course! Local Cuisine!!!!).

Which brings up the point… given the possibilities, people – everyone – would probably buy and consume WAY MORE FOOD! Here in Minnesota we all put on at least a good twenty pounds over the winter. A few more tater tot hot dishes a week, couple more pounds of meat and potatoes, double the gravy, hell YES to bacon, and we’d be rolling in the dough by the time spring trickled in. By adding only a few more items to our winter diets a day, we’d have some serious pounds to leverage that spring vacation on. And we wouldn’t even have to sweat the frantic getting-in-shape-before-we-try-to-get-in-that-d*mn-swimsuit trauma. We just roll by the Lipostation on our way to the airport, swimsuits in hand. Yippy-ki-yay Mehico - here I come!! (well.. maybe not Mehico)

Anyways…BTW – no offense to anyone struggling with their weight…Honestly, if there was a way to do it, I’d be the first in line to trade my ass in for a road trip. It might not get me to the In-n-Out burger I’ve been dreaming of (for three years now, going on four) but it could get me a day or two off.

D*mn this has been a long winter. And I’ve had WAY too much time to think.

So she’s decided to get pregnant and be a mom at 66. So what? How many people do I know (children) who’s fuck up parents can’t handle the responsibility so they (children) get raised by their grandparents? A lot. It happens all the time. Youth is not indicative of ability to parent children. She sounds like she’s together, rich, capable, and willing and able to take on the responsibilities. Therefore: So what?

Personally, I’d shoot myself if I found out I was pregnant. It’s a lot of work, takes a lot of energy and is HARD to be a good parent. At my age (40’s) I sometimes feel overwhelmed, burnt out and exhausted, and sometimes wonder if I have the energy to make it through. If I was in my sixties and trying to take on life’s problems, I’d keel. But if she thinks she can handle a teenager at 80, more power to her.

“Due to swine flu, state health officials are changing the way public schools report absences…” That was the beginning of the recorded message I got on my phone last night from the school district.

Now, because of this so-called pandemic, public schools have to report to State Health Officials EVERY student who is absent because of flu-like symptoms.

What are flu-like symptoms?

*fever of 100 degrees or higher

*sore throat,

*cough,

*body aches,

*runny nose

Give me a break. What illness doesn’t fit into that list?

So the big question is…….Am I going to be a good girl and tell the school that my children have flu-like symptoms when I call them in sick? Whatever.

(From the School Districts Website:) “Students or staff with influenza-like illness should stay home and not attend school for at least 7 days even if their symptoms resolve sooner. If after 7 days, the student or staff continues to have acute symptoms, he or she should stay home until 24 hours after these symptoms resolve. If you have questions, please contact your school’s Health Services Office.”

If my kids are sick, they’ll stay home until they’re better. Period. If they are better, they will go to school. I’m not keeping them out of school for a whole god damn week because they MIGHT have flu-LIKE symptoms for one day of that week. I WILL keep them out for as long as they need to for WHATEVER reason until they are well enough to go to school, whether it’s one day or three weeks. I will decide. It’s MY job to be the parent - NOT the governments. Fucking invasive pile of bullshit.

By the way, the number of people that die every year from staph infections would make this so-called swine flu epidemic look like a small piece of paradise. I don’t know. If was going to freak out about something, I’d freak out about Staph infections. The number of deaths caused by this nasty little infection is anywhere from 18,000 per year to 100,000 per year, (depending on who’s talking) and affects as many as 2 million people a year, give or take. I don’t know how many people die every year from contracting Staph in hospitals, and I don’t care enough to research it, but it’s plenty more than the number of people dying from Swine Flu. So if you’re thinking of going to a Hospital to fix your swine flu, well… good luck.

By the way, the TOTAL number of people that have died from Swine Flu in the USA, is 3. In case you missed that number, here it is again: THREE.

The TOTAL number of deaths from Swine Flu ON THE PLANET is 53. It’s an epidemic alright. With respect to that, am I going to report that my children’s symptoms are flu like? Fuck you. How’s that for an answer?

Why is it that when I go to well any public place I’m just assaulted by groups of people that piss me off. Here are a few

The New Age Family - These wonderful groups of people are the people that have to make sure that everything they buy is a reflection of their family’s values and all I want to do is scream in their face “IT’S A PACK OF FUCKING OREOS! IT DOESN’T SAY SHIT ABOUT YOU! MAYBE THAT YOU LIKE COOKIES!” Or at the very least not hold the family meeting in the middle of the aisle so that I can get by please.

The Ultra Religious Family - I’m fine with these people’s beliefs, I just don’t care. The only thing that I ask of them is to 1 not hand me a pamphlet for any reason. 2 Would they please refrain from singing “Jesus loves me” while they’re shopping for tube socks, it’s creepy.

People that stand there and look at simple basic things for 20 minutes. I’ll give you an example the dorky guy that looks at something like Peanut Butter or Eggs for 20 minutes. Don’t you just want to run up to them and scream “It’s peanut butter it all tastes the same! Buy the one you bought last week or buy the one on sale!” That’s how I make my decision when I buy beer. either Budweiser, Michelob or Coors will be on sale. Guess which one I pick.

The Family that all dresses the same. You’ve seen these people I’m sure. Usually they’re on their way to a family reunion or some event and they stop for let’s say Noodle Salad. While their standing in line i want to walk over and say you know you guys look like four jackasses with you “Miller Family Reunion 09″ t-shirts and the 8 pounds of noodle salad from a grocery store. Why couldn’t you just put the shirts on when you got there. You know put them over your normal everyday t-shirt save yourslef a little humliation.

I think there’s going to be a part two

That’s all for now

Warcorpse

I would have missed out on many hours of joy if my mother had not given me a puppy (Friskers) to play with.

My teeth would still be a mess if my mother had not made me wear braces.

I would never have become a lifeguard if my mother had not arranged for swimming lessons.

I would not have become friends with many of my favorite people if my mother had not introduced me to tennis, fencing and dancing.

I would never have gone to college if my mother had not expected it.

I could go on and on…

You can see more photos by Mountain Dude at www.dporterdvd.com

You know I can’t believe how lazy most people have gotten. What’s even more amazing is the fact that they can come up with thousands of excuses as to justify spending more time on the couch! Even the people that supossedly have “healthy lifestyles” are still lazy as hell. On that note how in the hell can you have a healthy lifestyle and eat everything OUT OF A BOX!

People that say that they don’t have time to cook are well just full of it! They are everyone has time to cook, they don’t because they want to be lazy. Hey that’s fine with me just admit it and we can move on. That’ll never happen because these people are nothing if not masters of excuses. At work one time I got a person I work with to a lovely shade of vermilion just by calmly proving and re-proving to her every time that yes she did in fact have time to cook.

I’ll prove it here to! Let’s take a average American family Husband Wife and let’s say three kids. The kids are Billy 12, Jamie 10 and Kerry 7 just for the sake of argument oh and both of the parents work. Let’s also say that each of the three kids are involved with three extracurricular activities each. Because the parents have that annoying trend of making sure that their kids experience everything. Even though the child has never once expressed ANY interest in any of the activities.

Now through the week I’ll stipulate that yes there really isn’t enough time to cook breakfast. Fourtunatly Cheerios are pretty healthy. On the weekends however you should always have time for a real breakfast.

So let’s say that the dad starts work at seven in the morning and works till three so he can be home when the kids get home Mom on the other hand works from 9 to 6. So the kids trottle off to school and the school day ends. However Billy has little league right after school and the other two come home on the bus. At 4 Jamie has dance class and at 4:30 Kerry has karate. Then Dad has to rush over to the school and get Billy so he can be at Piano class at 5:00. Then it’s back to pick up Jamie and Kerry and take both of them to pottery class. Mom picks up Billy and Dad gets high on terracotta fumes. The family is back with each other at I’ll say 6:30. Pretty busy day right. Now one of them we’ll either open up a box for dinner or stop at KFC or Boston Market or at worst Burger King. When asked why didn’t they cook they’ll say we didn’t have time. By the schedule you’d think they were right well their not!

There’s at least two to three opportunities to cook something far healthier than out of a box. First off the morning Mom could get up and put something like a roast or a chicken in a slow cooker for the day and it’d be ready by the time you got home. Don’t worry a slow cooker is designed to be left on even when your not there. Another great thing to make is Slow-Cooker Chili. Then with just a few vegetables that would take about 10 minutes they’d have dinner at 6:40 OR when they all get back do something that every family should do and that’s make dinner together. Billy Jamie and Kerry can each do a job in the kitchen. If you do that most meals can be done in 30 minutes. And their eating a fresh healthy meal at seven. 2 hours to digest and its off to bed at nine. My how hard was that.

If you want go check out www.warcorpse666.blogspot.com for my growing list of recipes